After his injury, Winston would always go around the house to the back door to avoid using that second set of steps. And of course Mugen would follow him. Whoever was walking them would usually go in the front door, walk through the kitchen, and meet them at the back door to let them in. It is our coming home ritual. (Occasionally said person may have absent-mindedly forgotten once or twice and left them outside waiting....) The funny thing is, even now that Winston is gone, Mugen still goes around to the back door, even though he has absolutely no trouble negotiating stairs. We've tried to encourage him to go up the front steps, but no dice. My sweet little rooster. Creature of habit.
Surgeons are also creatures of habit. We are taught by our revered mentor surgeons one way to do things (sometimes out of many possible ways), and this is the way we do it. Many times even without thinking why it is the best way to do it. That's why I love it when a medical student asks me, "So why do you do (fill in the blank) like that?" Sometimes I have the answer right away, but other times I honestly have to wrack my brain for a reason. Sometimes I outright admit that I don't know, that's just always the way I've done it. This generation of medical students is generally not ashamed to ask questions when they don't understand things, something my generation would never have dared. It is a good thing. It makes me re-evaluate the why every now and then instead of mindlessly monkeying forward. But at the end of the day, I enjoy the comfort of a routine; it soothes me to have a series of steps to follow for most things.
My husband, on the other hand is a "novelero," which in Spanish means someone who likes participating in new things (he gets this from his mother, Betty). Seriously, he is a "fad of the week" kind of guy. One week, it's "Honey, I want to buy a kayak." The next week it's a (seriously overpriced and interestingly frayed as if it had been used hard by someone else) new A&F jacket. You can see how it would be hard to keep someone of this nature on track towards a goal! It keeps my life interesting though, because he always has the latest gossip, whether it's international politics or who is pregnant right now (and nobody else knows, so you can't tell anybody, do you understand???)
There are two things my husband has been really serious about: his motorcycle and his studies. He has worked very hard for both of these things. And he's stuck with me for 13 years (so that's really three things)! He is a creature of curiosity, of novelty and innovation. I am a creature of routine, of nesting, of ritual. My Mugen and I, we are very similar in this way. He loves to know exactly what is going to happen next at any given point in time. Likes to know where we're going to turn, what route we're going to take. This soothes him. Makes him feel grounded. Anything out of the ordinary is very disturbing to him. I understand these sentiments. I am this way as well.
In the operating room, there is a dance that happens before the operation can begin. In my mind, I chant "Gloves, lights, lead, loupes, antibiotics, radiology, pager, position, prep." To keep me from forgetting any of the necessary things I need to do before I scrub. Once these tasks are complete, I scrub my hands. The same way. Every time. Then I gown and glove. Apply the drapes. Down first, then up, then sides. Time out? All agree. Ask the anesthesiologist, "May we begin?" "Of course." "Marking pen. Knife. Incision."
Each operation is a ritual. A different prayer to the gods of the hernia, the gallbladder, the appendix. There are certain steps which are followed over and over each time. In each person the basic anatomy is the same. It is soothing to KNOW WHERE I AM, what is my purpose, what to expect next.
Unfortunately, since the dragon hatched, there has been very little routine in our lives. Every day is something new. I work for so many hours each day and every remaining minute, every remaining drop of energy is focused on what the baby needs. Little sleep. Lots of firsts. Almost impossible to stick to a routine in any way. Our lives have been essentially consumed by this (not-so) tiny creature. So, I will be honest. I have not trained for the marathon. It may have been naive for me to think it was possible. The best I have done since the baby was born is 2 runs in a week. My longest run since said baby has been 7 miles. Not quite marathon material.
So, unfortunately my friends, you (and I) will have to be satisfied with the half marathon (I'm not even sure I'm going to be able to pull that off!!!) But in the words of the immortal master Yoda, I will DO. For there is no TRY. My Mugen deserves it!
The (half) marathon is only three days away. Please, if you can find a few dollars to spare, donate to help rescue retired racers! This is my reason for running!!!
Follow this link to donate! Thank you!
http://www.crowdrise.com/TeamSteelCityGreyhounds2013/fundraiser/taraloux
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| Winston Churchill ca. 2008 |
